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Copyright The Quipping Queen 2005.

NAME THAT PLANET

Or, who put the ram in rama-dama-ding-dong…I’d like to shake his hand?

By Ovid Publius Hadweenzic, an errant Knight-In-Shining Armor, with a trusty thirty-pound encyclopedia under his arm to keep him warm at night, a bag of dog biscuits to keep strange critters happy, and a wooden hobby-horse which he rides every now and then to remind him that he’s destined to become the world’s first cosmic cowboy catapulted into space

The world of late has been faced with a new conundrum, (as if we haven’t got enough to keep us busy for the next millennium). What to call the newly discovered 10th planet of our solar system?

Scientists were sick and tired of calling the nameless nuisance holding up the rear of the universe, “2003 UB313″. And, politicians the world over needed something to distract the hungry hordes. The latter were totally bummed out about having to put up with the usual ration of bread and circuses, and were preparing to stomp all over the newly-planted flower beds, hurl hanging baskets about with glee, and encourage their precious pets to piddle or poop on the well-manicured lawns outside the seats of government.

While spin doctors spun their wheels aimlessly and birds began to twitter off-key, bigwigs stopped clipping their coupons, playing a round of golf and pressing the flesh. Minor minions also decided to get in on the act of being totally dumbfounded as to what to do.

They were all in a deep and dark funk. And, popping “happy” pills did not seem to relieve them of their profound perturbation about the possibility that some “rogue astronomer” might leap up and take credit for discovering the newest heavenly body. More to the point, they feared their worst nightmare might actually come true …and shudder the thought …that some renegade rascal of a rapscallion would name the latest addition to our solar system … “The Big Bopper”.

So, while it’s comfy to know that “2003 UB313″ regularly orbits the sun (like anyone really gives a hoot), and is larger than Pluto (not that anyone’s been out there lately with a measuring tape to confirm this of course), the real issue at hand is giving the number a human face as it were.

After all, if there’s one thing savvy, consumer-conscious human beings can’t stand is not having a brand-name label and familiar image they can trust attached to all their stuff. And, who knows for Pete’s sake just what treasures and treats lie waiting beneath the surface of “2003 UB313″ to be pinched, pillaged, or plundered!

In order to avoid a long, drawn-out competition between roving bands of nincompoops and ninnyheads inhabiting Earth, (all of whom claim to have spotted the ‘whatchamacallit’ with their backyard binoculars), it was decided that something had to be done, and fast.

Concern that the identification of a new planet might spark a celestial civil war, (as the other nine blessed bodies with deep roots among the Greek and Roman Gods were not exactly thrilled about the news of a new mythical deity in the neighborhood trying to horn in on their sacred solar system), all of which prompted the United Nations to convene an extraordinary meeting to deliberate upon the matter.

Meanwhile, long-forgotten mythical deities seeking a new lease on life were threatening to cash in their “Get Out of Jail Free Card”, not to mention demanding a “Free Lunch” in addition to exercising their “Equal Opportunity Rights”.

Fortunately, one dedicated diplomat from the land of ice and snow stepped forward to announce that he had a suggestion. Why not invoke the “not withstanding clause” in a repatriated Canadian constitution — it might just do the trick. When asked what this had to do with the price of tea in China or the finer points of English grammar, he replied tersely if not curtly, “such a clause permits Canucks to do anything we please as long as an emergency has been declared”. He was politely thanked for his tangential contribution to the esteemed gathering of well-known windbags and hot-air enthusiasts by the Third Under-Secretary to the Snooze-Button Control Operator (seated quietly next to a somnolent-looking Secretary General who was indulging in his favorite passion — navel-gazing).

So, in the absence of an answer that everyone could live with, the powers that be sent out a 911 call on the Transcendental Meditation Hotline. Since the “Big Guy in the Sky” was busy performing miracles on 34th street, burning bushes, and whipping up loaves of bread and oodles of fish for supper that night, I took the call.

This was a fortunate stroke of fate as it turned out. Fending off one-eyed-one-horned-flying-purple-people eaters and gritting teeth like grand pooh-bahs do certainly appealed to my keen spirit of adventure. However, it seems the ornery overlords were a tad miffed at being put on hold for four and a half hours. As if that were not enough, they complained constantly about the miserable choice of mood music and weren’t at all impressed with having to navigate a newly-minted maze of dulcet toned, voice-activated digital telephone instructions, (affectionately called the “Tree of Useless Knowledge”).

Anyway after much consternation and constipated consideration, I perused the pithy pages of my encyclopedia for a hint as to how to solve this disturbing dilemma, namely, how to come up with a marvellous moniker for the new planet. After much too-ing and fro-ing, not to mention more than the occasional hemming and hawing, the answer popped out of my snorting cerebellum. Just install a big suggestion box in a mall somewhere and let everyone toss in their two-cents worth.

The names below represent a sample of those submitted (just to prove this was a fair, legitimate, and totally transparent community consultation process):

Bacchus (He puts on a terrific beer garden, organizes nifty wine & cheese affairs not to mention hosts more than a few hot-tub & toga parties)

Buddhabot (A Warp-Speed Wisdom Wonderkin)

Captain Kangaroo (A terrific child-minder on a Saturday morning)

Cleopatra (In honor of “The Queen of Face-Lifts, Tummy Tucks & Botox Injections”)

Cronos (Nominated by Father Time in honor of the “World’s First ‘Clockwatcher’”)

Cupid (He deserves a bigger and better target practise range don’t you think?)

Hades (The Daring Duathalon Dude who invented “The Burnt Barbecued Beef Challenge” and the “Walking on Hot Coals Contest” …for macho men of course!)

Hera (In honor of the “Diva of Domestic Drudgery”)

Hermes (Didn’t he invent the typewriter?)

Juno (Pays tribute to the patron saint and power-broker behind the miracle of “Immaculate Conception”)

Joan of Arc (Nominated by the “International Society of Trojan Horse Engineers” to honor the world’s first under-cover hobby-horse rider)

Leprechaun (Nominated by the “International Association of Environmentally-Friendly, Vertically-Challenged, Transparent Entities” for “exemplary conduct above and beyond the call of duty”)

Loki (”Mischief-Makers Anonymous” voted him the most popular “Master of Mayhem” for 2005!)

Poseidon (Nominated by “The International Association of Sea Monsters & Shipwrecks” for his invaluable contribution to establishing fraternal relations with the “Bathing Beauties & Mermaids Society”)

Puck (Someone has to poke fun at the folks on the newest planet in our solar system!)

Robin Goodfellow (Nominated by “The Goody-Two-Shoes Society of America & Friends” for his swarthy looks and swooning charisma, award-winning pearly-toothed smile, and unparalleled jolly-jump-up capabilities)

Satyr (In honor of “The King of Canoodling, Spooning & Romping About In the Holly-Fuds”)

Spiderwoman (A wickedly wonky weaver-of-webs if ever there was one!)

Titan (Nominated by the highly-respected “International Association of Windbags & Hot-Air Enthusiasts” as “The Next Best Thing to ‘The Big Bopper’”)

The Pit Stop At the End of The Universe (The “International Commode, Outhouse & Tinkle-Pantry Manufacturers’Association” and the “Fast-Food Franchise Owners of the Universe” recommended this planet as the best place to showcase their new cutting-edge “Cosmic Water-Closet Technology” and new veggie-burger vending machines)

Thor (In honor of the “Father of Firecrackers” who adores letting the sparks fly and putting on a great “Thunderbolt & Lightening Spectacle” every now and then!)

The Queen of Sheba (Now there’s one very ‘Saucy Sylph of Shebang’!)

Tom Dick & Harry (Nominated by “The International Association of Innocuous Individuals” because these guys are more qualified than the “Three Musketeers” to keep up with the Jones’ not to mention fill every Joe-Job going in the universe)

Vulcan (Voted “Playmate of the Year” by the “Vacuous Vixens of the Universe”)

Wink’n Blink’n & Nod (Nominated by the “European Union of Fairy Tale Writers”, “The Sandmans’ Society”, the “North-American Sleep-Deprivation Research Institute” and “Sleepwalkers’ Anonymous”)

Xena (In honor of the world’s first “Weed Whacking Wizardess”!)

Yahoo (Nominated by the “International Association of Podunk Places” for solving a pressing social problem - where to accommodate hard-to-house “Yammering Yokels”)

Zorro (An equal opportunity, incognitio, Hunky Halloween Hero)

With all the mall ballots and entries counted in the “Name That New Planet Contest”, the gruelling selection task began. After 48 excruciating hours, a talented tollbooth attendant, one Heaver Herstmonceux, (from Three Legs Town, Ohio) was declared the winner. As luck would have it, the name chosen eloquently expresses the essence of those who have made a lonely planet at the end of the universe their home.

For the nail-biting nosey-parkers who’ve been waiting anxiously for the answer so they can fill their rumor mill with the lastest gossip — quit complaining, cool your heels and hold your horses! And, if that doesn’t work, take my advice humble advice - “Get a Life!”

Okay, okay …so who do you think would dare to live on a remote “Bob-Fearing” planet at the end of the universe?

Who else …but a band of boisterous do-gooders with a devil-may-care attitude to life, liberty, and the pleasurable pursuit of puttering about (entailing a well-stocked refrigerator full of beer, frozen pizza and ice-cream — the staple diet of these casually-dressed cosmic critters).

For those who are still in a quandary, the winning entry was you guessed it …an easy-to-remember, four-lettered word that just trips off the tip of your tongue …“DAVE”!

About the Author

Ovid Publius Hadweenzic, Ph.D., a professor of profound and pithy knowledge spends much of his expandable time expounding upon the virtues and vices of playing with silly putty - a keen issue of debate in THE COURT OF THE QUIPPING QUEEN

If you’re hunting for a good freelance copywriter and have never
done it before, or if you have but find yourself needing another
for the first time in a while, I don’t envy you. This “brave
new” e-world has turned your once straightforward search of a
neatly stacked file of brochures and introductory letters into a
bothersome wade through a mucky world of half-baked online
listings and search results which only seem to list those
freelance copywriters who are experts in SEO, or at least know
what the heck it means (search engine optimization).

You: “I just need a good freelance copywriter to write this
product launch brochure who’s not going leave me hanging or make
me ask for another round of financing.”

Google: “Results 1-10 of 44,700 for brochure copywriter (0.17
seconds).”

And that’s not even a very popular search term. Yet, with 44,700
doors (or thousands more depending on your search) to choose
from, what are the chances you’ll click the one that leads to:

•A freelance copywriter who plays nice with designers and
doesn’t charge a first-born child

•A freelance copywriter who knows when and where to offer their
expertise on how to communicate a message

•Creative, cliché-free, differentiating, success-enabling copy
that is turned in clean and on deadline

It’s probably better than a 1-in-44,700 chance, but you’re still
more likely to fall short than be wildly ecstatic about your
freelance copywriter decision unless you add a few points of
structure to guide you through the online chaos:

1.Look at freelance copywriters further down the list. Unless
you’re specifically looking for an SEO copywriter, how high a
freelance copywriter or a link to a freelance copywriter ranks
in search results is not indicative of how good that copywriter
may be. Search engines rank web sites according to formulas of
keyword saturation in site copy, meta tags, links and other
places. Not how well a freelance copywriter’s work achieved his
client’s objectives. Spend some time at this. There is more to
the marketing, branding and advertising worlds than the
Internet, and there are many worthy and successful freelance
copywriters who work in the offline world, but have only a token
presence on the Net. Go ahead and look at the top-ranked
freelance copywriters, but investigate the others as well. Look
at who their clients are, the work they do, the brands they’ve
worked on, what their site is like and testimonials from past
and current clients. That should give you a good gauge. Or if
you like the advertising a specific company do a search for
“CompanyX AND copywriter.”

2.If you want quality, steer clear of “bidding” sites. There’s
too many of them already, and more seem to be popping up all the
time. The online auction is a great concept for your old fishing
equipment or clunker on cinder blocks, but not for a good
freelance copywriter, designer, photographer or any other
“creative service” professional. Sites like Elance.com, Guru.com
and their many cousins allow service providers to whore
themselves out for projects in a reverse auction where the
lowest bid wins. Unfortunately, there really is no winner. The
freelance copywriter (or whoever) gets a fraction of the fair
market value for their work and the client, unless they’re
extremely lucky, will be stuck with a student, green amateur or
someone who might not even speak English wellto say nothing
about the copy they’ll write.

3.Seek out freelance copywriters with online portfolios. Find
freelance copywriters who have some kind of online portfolio. Go
through it in detail. Try to get an idea of the communications
problem the freelance copywriter had to solve and get a grasp on
the talent and thinking that went into creating the finished
copy. Then ask yourself, “If I was in the market for something
like this, would this make me more interested in learning about
this product or want to buy it?” The work of a good copywriter
will be obvious.

4.Judge by the work, not the product. You may have a great new
product that everyone’s going to want, or an old product that
everyone already has, but with a new feature or something. Now,
your first instinct in finding someone who’s going to write copy
to sell this product is to find someone who, if you’re selling
underwater titanium door hinges, has written copy for underwater
steel or plastic door hinges. Yes, too many marketers think if a
freelance copywriter has only written for X and not Y, that they
can’t write for Y. This kind of thinking is misguided. Again, go
back to No. 3 and look at the portfolio. Gauge the talent. If
they did a great job communicating something about X, you can
bet they’ll be able to do the same for Y. A freelance copywriter
isn’t defined by the product. He is defined by how he writes
about that product.

These guidelines, along with a little “buyer beware” mentality,
will help you wield the Internet as the powerful information
tool it’s purported to be. You will find a good freelance
copywriter.

Over the years, collecting coins has grown from being just a hobby to becoming a full-blown enterprise with numerous Internet sites devoted to coins. Over the next several weeks, I will give you a little background about coin collecting to help those who want to pursue this as a hobby and maybe even make some money in the process.

People have been collecting coins for centuries, because of their beauty, their value, and their history. When you hold an old coin in your hand, it allows you to take a step back in history to the time of the coinage. For over 2,500 years, man's history has been reflected in coins. From the ancient Greeks, the Romans, the British Empire, the California Gold Rush, and US coins, man's achievements have been depicted in coins.

Coin collecting, called numismatics, has become one of the most rewarding and popular hobbies in the world today. Over a period of time as you begin to add more coins to your collection, you will be pleasantly surprised at the hours of enjoyment your collection will bring. If you have taken time and care with your collection, not only will it be of value to you and those you pass it on to, but could also be an investment for the future.

Please check back for future articles where we will be discussing early coins, 19th and 20th century coins, commemorative coins, gold coins, determining the value of coins, and buying coins.

Copyright © 2005 Susan Daniel and Debbie Overstreet

About Susan and Debbie: Susan and Debbie are internet marketers. You can review more articles and Web sites on coin collecting by visiting http://www.showmerarecoils.com.

When you have made the decision to rid yourself of unwanted
hairs there are two choices to consider electrolysis and laser.
As with electrolysis, cases of scarring have been reported, but
these are extremely rare. Compared with electrolysis, laser hair
removal is more precise and much faster. Electrolysis is
intended to be a permanent hair procedure, but much like laser
hair removal, it is not guaranteed to be 100% effective. Prior
to laser technology, the only options for removing unwanted hair
were smelly hair removal creams, sharp razors, stinging wax or
painful electrolysis needles. In fact, laser technology is
already eliminating the need for these traditional methods.

Almost anybody who has undesirable hair is a candidate for laser
hair removal. Both men and women have found laser technology
beneficial for hair removal. A common area where laser hair
removal is used is the face, chin, and upper lip on women.
Another area to receive laser hair removal for women is the
legs.

For laser hair removal to work, the light energy is selectively
absorbed by highly pigmented hair fibers and hair follicles. So,
less laser energy is required to remove upper lip hair than for
pubic hair. Several wavelengths of laser energy have been used
for hair removal, from visible light to near infrared radiation.
In facial hair removal, a low energy laser beam is directed
towards a group of hair follicles.

Current laser hair removal techniques use wavelengths of light
that target melanin, the pigment that determines color of both
hair and skin. The level of pain depends on the patient and the
person’s skin and hair type. The presence of a suntan makes hair
removal less effective and increases the likelihood of scarring
or skin injury. As such, skin color must be taken into
consideration. The risks can include skin discoloration,
swelling, and infection. Generally, patients with dark hairs and
fair skin respond best to laser hair removal.

While laser hair removal is an excellent treatment option,
research efforts continue to enhance the procedure. The diode
laser has a longer wavelength than other lasers used for hair
removal, which may improve treatment results on darker skin
types. The most common side effects are edema and erythema,
which generally resolve within 24 hours after treatment.

Though it is relatively painless, you may experience a bit of
discomfort from the procedure. While it is a minimally invasive
procedure, the procedure is not totally free from risks.
Fortunately, the complications are rare if an experienced and
skilled physician does it. When done properly, the procedure can
be performed quickly and comfortably during an outpatient visit.

Get ready to experience the hassle-free world of hair removal
with laser technology. However, when selecting the facility to
perform you hair removal, ask them about their experience and
any other concerns you may have. In addition, laser hair removal
is not necessarily permanent; most people will experience some
regrowth within a year.

As promised, here is an over-view of the main essential vitamins and minerals, BUT, rather than take them in isolation it is better to take a good multi-vitamin and mineral tablet aimed specifically at the over 50s.

Vitamin

What it can do for you, for example -

Found in, for example -

Helpful Advice

A

Promotes growth, strong bones, healthy skin, hair, teeth, and gums. Builds resistance to respiratory infections. Good for eyes, particularly night blindness.

Carrots, fish oils, eggs, green and yellow vegetables, milk and dairy products

10,000 iu is the average daily dose.Prolonged high doses can be bad for you as it can be stored in the body.

B

Helps to maintain a healthy nervous system, muscles and heart and energy.Good for stress and aids memory.

Whole-wheat, whole brown rice, oatmeal, bran, milk, liver, fish, vegetables, beef, pork, nuts, fruits.

It is a good idea to take all the various B vitamins in one B complex tablet. Smoking and alcohol can deplete the body of this vitamin.C

Aids in the prevention of the common cold, infections, helps repair body tissues, eg. helps healing after surgery.

Citrus fruits, green leafy vegetables, tomatoes, potatoes. NB. It is generally not a good idea to eat citrus fruits, eg oranges, grapefruits, etc. if you suffer from arthritis.

Helps the body absorb iron. Vit C works best when taken with calcium and magnesium. Vit C is excreted from the body quite quickly so it is a good idea to take a time-release tablet. Smoking can destroy Vit C.

D

Works with calcium for strong bones and teeth

Acquired through sunlight, eating plenty of fish and fish oils, and dairy products

Dosages over 5,000 iu daily not recommended. Dark-skinned people living in northern climates usually need to take additional Vit D.

E

Good for the skin and helps you to look younger. Helps healing of burns, and helps with fatigue.

Wheat germ, soya beans, broccoli, spinach and leafy greens, whole-grain cereals and eggs.

Iron tablets destroy the efficiency of Vit E if taken together - allow 8 hours between. Women over 50 and menopausal women should increase their Vit E intake.

MINERALS

Calcium

Essential for strong bones and healthy teeth

Milk, cheese, soyabeans, sardines, walnuts, sunflower seeds and green vegetables.

Calcium and iron are the two minerals often deficient in a woman’s diet. Dolomite tablets are a natural form of calcium and magnesium

Iron

Necessary for the production of red blood corpuscles (haemoglobin). Prevents iron-deficiency anaemia and fatigue.

Red meat and offal, egg yolks, nut, beans, molasses, oatmeal

For normal adults the recommended amount is 10 - 18 mg, but before increasing the amount (perhaps because of fatigue, etc) it is better to consult your doctor. It is worth noting that ferrous sulphate, a form of iron that appears in many supplements, may destroy your Vit E: the chelated form of iron is preferable.

Magnesium

Necessary for the optimum functioning of nerves and muscles. Helps fight depression. Good for the heart.

Figs, nuts (in particular almonds), seeds, apples, grapefruit and apples.

People who suffer from cramp are often deficient in magnesium. Alcoholics are also usually deficient. Dolomite (a balanced formula of magnesium and calcium) is a good quality supplement.

Selenium

Works with Vitamin E and appears to slow down the aging process. Helps with energy.

Wheat germ, tuna fish, onions, broccoli, tomatoes, bran

Selenium is important to human nutrition. Because of intensive farming and food processing techniques, many of our foods are depleted of Selenium.

Zinc

Good for the immune system, muscle function and blood and brain function. It can also help with healing.

Choice meats such as steak and chops, wheat germ, pumpkin seeds, eggs.

Men should keep their zinc levels up, particularly if worried about prostrate problems. Zinc and manganese are thought to help ward of senility in the elderly.

REMEMBER: What you put into your body is what you get out of your body! So think of food as fuel and choose food from the chart above.
Sadly, cakes, biscuits, etc. are merely ‘comfort’ foods and not nourishing fuel for the body.
The only result we get from eating too many buns is perhaps ending up looking like one - which is certainly food for thought!!!

NOW HERE ARE A FEW MORE SUPPLEMENTS TO HELP YOU ‘SPRING’ INTO SPRING.

Co-enzyme 10 The body’s ’spark-plug’ for energy.

Ginkgo Biloba Helps maintain good circulation to the body’s extremities (so good for those who suffer from cold hands and feet). Also improves blood supply to the brain and helps with poor memory.

Glucosamine Helps maintain connective tissues in the joints and is believed to stimulate cartilage growth and promote smooth functioning joints.

Echinacea Boosts the immune system - an aid in the prevention of colds and flu.

Garlic Also boosts the immune system and, importantly, has antiviral, antibacterial and antifungal properties.

Omega 3 fish oils. Benefits heart, circulation, joints and brain.

Evening Primrose Oil Good for the immune system and appearance of skin.

So all the above are a bonus for the over 50’s.

Now we all know that there is nothing like a nice cup of tea of give yourself a lift, and at last it has been confirmed that tea is actually good for us (this comes as a surprise, as we all know from experience that if we enjoy something then it is guaranteed that someone will come up with the discovery that it is bad for us). Research has also shown that Green Tea contains remarkable health promoting properties. So next time you feel like a ‘cuppa’ reach for the Green Tea - drink it on its own or with a slice of lemon - and it is really refreshing. As a matter of interest, I recently visited a tearoom where they had on offer a choice of over 300 different teas, and guess which one the owner drank? Yes, Green Tea …’nough said!

MENOPAUSAL TREATMENT

Now that there is concern about the long term use of HRT (hormone replacement therapy), many women are looking for a natural alternative in order to alleviate menopausal symptoms and maintain a healthy lifestyle when their oestrogen levels drop. Phytoestrogens are oestrogens derived from plants that work in a similar way to ours. These are found in soyamilk, soyabeans, linseeds, pumpkin seeds, red clover, etc. So here is an opportunity to give you the recipe for what is known as the ‘HRT CAKE’. So why not cut yourself a slice of this ‘feel good’ cake to go with your cup of green tea?

HRT CAKE

Ingredients:

50 gr sunflower seeds, 50 gr pumpkin seeds, 50 gr linseeds,
50 gr sesame seeds, 50 gr almond flakes, 50 gr raisins.
100 gr cranberries, 150 gr chopped dried apricots,
2″ stem ginger, chopped, teaspoon nutmeg, teaspoon cinnamon,
1 tablespoon malt extract, 3 tablespoons apple juice,
425 ml (approx) of soya milk (add more milk if necessary to make a soft dropping consistency).

Method:

Mix all the dry ingredients in a large mixing bowl.
Add the cranberries, apple juice and soya milk and stir well.
Leave to soak for approx hour.
Pre-heat the oven to 190C.
Line a loaf tin with baking paper and spoon mixture in.
Cook in pre-heated oven for approx l hrs.
When cooled, slice and store in freezer.

If you don’t feel inclined to bake a cake, why not include a good percentage of the above ingredients with your breakfast porridge.

Here is MY version of a nourishing/HRT breakfast.

Into a microwaveable dish mix oats, pumpkin seeds, sunflower seeds, linseeds, sesame seeds, raisins; toss in all or any of the following as your fancy takes you - chopped dried apricots, prunes, apple, dates, almonds, walnuts, also perhaps a spoonful of malt extract or honey if desired, cover with water or preferably soymilk, and microwave for approx. 3-4 minutes. Eat with a dollop of bio-yoghurt on top (if desired) and you’ll be truly set up for the day - you certainly won’t feel the need for a mid-morning snack.

And whilst we are on the subject of the menopause, don’t forget the importance of looking after your bones with extra calcium.

* Healthspan of Guernsey (www.healthspan.co.uk) offer a good rangeof tax-free vitamins and minerals with free post and packing. They also print a very good informative monthly magazine, and if you spend over £10 (and with so much on offer it’s quite difficult to spend less than £10) they will add your name to their
mailing list for a free monthly magazine.

Top of Page

STOP PRESS ! ! !

Although in my previous column I promised not to mention chocolate, I can’t wait to pass on the good news ….. recent research has shown that chocolate is actually good for us - Halleluiah! I give below an extract from the Daily Mail, 1 June 04…….

“CHOCOLATE ‘KEEPS YOU IN GOOD HEART’
Scientists endeared themselves to chocolate lovers yesterday when they revealed that eating the sweet can help protect against heart disease. The researchers, at the University of California, San Francisco, found that the dark variety of the sweet with a cocoa content of over 70 per cent can be beneficial to blood flow. Better blood flow is crucial to avoiding narrowed or clogged arteries, leading to heart attack or stroke.” …….

I must say I personally agree with the newspaper heading, as my heart always feels good when I tuck into a bar of my favourite chocolate. It is only after I have demolished it that my heart sinks when the guilty feeling kicks in. Well, as long as it is the dark chocolate with over 70% cocoa solids then we needn’t spoil the pleasure with a feeling of guilt. And, unlike milk chocolate or other comfort food such as chocolate cake, there is the added bonus that we are unlikely to put on too much weight with this ‘high cocoa content’ chocolate, as it is quite difficult to over-indulge with this very rich dark chocolate.

However, don’t forget that ‘less is more’! Remember what happened when the medical profession informed us that ‘a glass of red wine is good for the heart? Generally, people only heard ‘red wine is good for the heart’ and ignored the recommendation of ‘one glass’. Unfortunately, just because you consume a bottle of red does not mean that you are consuming a bottle of health. (Sorry to be a ‘party puper’). Similarly, if you are a chocoholic, then try exchanging your usual milk, fudge, cream, chocolate for a small amount of high quality dark chocolate containing over 70% cocoa solids - enjoy it, and,
hopefully, reap the rewards.

Visit Mabels…Maintaining Bygone Times, containing numerous articles thoughtfully researched mainly for the older person. You may access these articles by visiting http://www.mabels.org.uk/ - You will learn about the best tips, latest news & advice to improve your health, fitness, finances & retirement as well as information on nostalgic topics, places to visit, leisure & lifestyle, mobility & helpful organisations to make the most out of life and much, much more to benefit “Your Quality of Life”.

The time comes for all mortgage brokers and loan officers to consider spending some of their hard earned money by testing the waters of mortgage leads.

After all, leads are the name of the game.

If the time is right for you, it is important to do you research, remember, you are testing the waters, not diving right in. Investigate as many lead companies as you can before you decide which one is right for you.

Equally important is the lead itself, while doing your research, consider these three things about the type of lead you will be getting.

Where did the lead come from?

Speak with a representative from the lead company to determine where the leads are being generated from. Lead companies use different methods for obtaining their leads. Some of the more common ways lead companies generate leads is through e-mail campaigns, advertisements on search engines, directing potential customers to web sites that they own, and purchasing leads in bulk from other companies.

Is the lead fresh or recycled?

Some lead companies sell their leads in what they call “real time,” which means the leads are fresh, usually no more than a day old.

A recycled lead, is a lead that a company will sell multiple times, or they are buying their leads in bulk at a cheap price and reselling them for a profit.

Not to say one is better than the other, the reason being, the difference in price.

A fresh lead will undoubtedly cost more than a recycled lead. It all depends on what you are looking for, quality or quantity.

If the lead is bad, will you get your money back?

Make sure you are 100% confident that the lead company you are dealing with has a fair return policy. Most lead companies have software in place, or verify the lead before they sell it to weed out any fake, or bogus leads. But even with these barriers in place, it is not unusual for one to slip through the cracks. If you receive a bogus lead, there is no reason why you shouldn’t get your money back.

Jay Conners has more than fifteen years of sales and marketing experience in the banking and mortgage industry, and is the owner of J. Conners, Mortgage leads reviews a mortgage resource center for mortgage brokers, loan officers, and lenders. He is also the owner of Www.callprospect.com a mortgage lead company, specializing in fresh leads. Jay Conners can be contacted via e-mail at sales@callprospect.com